grateful

There come to a point in your life, when all that you could say is "I am so very grateful".

It is simply because that's the only thing you could think of.

I am so very grateful for all the things you have done or try to do for me and, despite whether I believe in God or not, I thank God that you are happy because all that I want is people to be happy.

And, this is the point, despite of the fact that I want to call God a sadistic baster, I say to God, thank you for making me happy.

I guess this thought might be esoteric to you but it is dear to me...

And, maybe, one day all esoteric things I say to you would be understood and that is why I am trying to learn not imagine in my head-- myself using the cane of mine to be hitting on the back of your head especially when I am not even so sure what exactly I have said, heard, and purceived... lol sigh

And, this is when you recite this poem....

綠蟻新醅酒,
紅泥小火爐。
晚來天欲雪,
能飲一杯無?