Meow and energy level

I had an amazing insight today.

There seems to be some sort of positive correlation between the level of energy I sense and the degree and amount of meowing I do when getting my morning coffee.

I have observed through out the past few days and more the lessened degree of engagement or motivation to engage in conversations.

For me, such shall be a warning sign for the pending depression to strike.

So, this afternoon, I sat on the bench to have the sunlight falling on my face and coming through my eyes before mailing out one more package in my post office and getting on to see my doctor.

Somewhere in between, some moment in time, I thought to myself....

"Yo, what am I gonna do with this thick cloud of depression that is so very ready to fall onto my head (imagine me looking up over my head when typing this sentence) and now that I know it is absolutely only a few inches away? 8-O"



Essentially, there are three major plausible contributing factors for this thick cloud to converge:

1. Nature's course (God knows why but it just kept on getting cycling through... 8-O lol sigh)
2. I am starting to get back more down to earth and to feel the pressure of reality over my head (that goes along with the suppression hypothesis)
3. Diminished exposure to sunlight when comparing to previous months (before winter came)

I used to have more resources to cut the cycle of depression short...

At that point, the best thing I could do, in addition to religiously taking my morning pill, I went to the gym and worked out so hard that the endorphins would overflow...

Sitting here in my room, I thought to myself, such doesn't seem to be too much of an option at this point (although, I did, after my climbing up and down the hill exercise yesterday, did, for the first time in the last 8 month, felt an extra shut of endorphin in my body flow! :-D)

What could I do at this point?

I do not expect no impact from my depression to take because fighting a part of you will be doing nothing more than like a doggy chasing its own tail....

I do hope, lesser degree of impact, converting the feeling of being hit by a truck to moody blues-- slowly, together we swing...

Then, I stood up and took the vitamin B that I have been skipping for a while.

Vitamin Bs seem to do a good job in lifting my energy level... shall I have it correctly recall...

A hypothesis to test-- 2 pills, zoloft and vitamin B-- today's meowing activity as baseline, tomorrow's meowing as the comparison-- how well Vitamin B could help in lifting my energy and to help me tickle off that overcasting thick cloud of depression.... lol sigh


Question

The Moody Blues
(written by Justin Hayward)

Why do we never get an answer
When we're knocking at the door
With a thousand million questions
About hate and death and war?
'Cos when we stop and look around us,
There is nothing that we need,
In a world of persecution
That is burning in its greed.

Why do we never get an answer
When we're knocking at the door
Because the truth is hard to swallow
That's what the war of love is for

It's not the way that you say it
When you do those things to me
It's more the way that you mean it
When you tell me what will be

And when you stop and think about it
You won't believe it's true
That all the love you've been giving
Has all been meant for you.

I'm looking for someone to change my life,
I'm looking for a miracle in my life
And if you could see what it's done to me,
To lose the love I knew
Could safely lead me through.

Between the silence of the mountains,
And the crashing of the sea,
There lies a land I once lived in,
And she's waiting there for me,
But in the grey of the morning,
My mind becomes confused,
Between the dead and the sleeping,
And the road that I must choose.

I'm looking for someone to change my life,
I'm looking for a miracle in my life
And if you could see what it's done to me,
To lose the love I knew,
Could safely lead me to
The land that I once knew,
To learn as we grow old
The secrets of our soul.

It's not the way that you say it
When you do those things to me
It's more the way you really mean it
When you tell me what will be

Why do we never get an answer
When we're knocking at the door
With a thousand million questions
About hate and death and war?
'Cos when we stop and look around us,
There is nothing that we need,
In a world of persecution
That is burning in its greed.