Monday, January 7, 2008

The day I heard someone called Madame Psychosis

Today is another one of those nothing happening day.

I woke up.

I packed the stampin' up I sold and tried to take these babies to the post office on my own with the aid of my little red Cadillac.

I thought I have been trying, my body, to get much stronger...

I thought pushing the cart slowly won't be too much work.

I thought it would be just another way of training my own strength.

One thing I didn't know was I am not as strong as I thought I was... (how wonderful Life demisconcepts us so seamlessly... lol)

The IME might be right... 1 lb at a time for 25 times I could move... except for not 25 bls at a time. lol sigh

One blocked I moved and I found myself about to pass out.

My hero I called...

"Yo.. could you please help me take one heavy package to the post office because them all together too much for me to push."

My hero, to the post office, the package, he took.

Me, stubbornly got my coffee from the deli, before on that wonderful bench I half crashed.

"You want me to call the ambulance."
My thoughtful friend asked as I strove, my coffee, to pay.

"Nope. "
So I replied.

I had just made myself, somehow, too tired.

Envision a world without boundaries
life just taught me another lesson of my limits. lol sigh

Just need to let the passing out pass
Something I learned to do throughout all these times
Let myself regenerate

Next to a new dear friend I sat.

"Sit down and take a rest." He said.

Ya... no need on the street to pass out
A bit inconvenient

Next to me he sat
His speech
me accompanied
Half listening
Half asleep
That's it

From then on till
t'is I don't know how long...
when enough rest I had...

Towards the post office
My rent to drop
continued I walk

Back to where I started earlier in the day
Nothing much done
Many hours past

Another coffee I got
A springy winter's day
Another chapter of Oliver Sacks
About "The Twins"
I leisurely read

Multiple diagnoses been applied
Autistic, psychotic, or retarded
numerical ability experts conceive not
Eidetic or not

111-ness and tri-37
They see
Language explain not

I thought to myself...
words I type
I just feel
I think not
although my words exception not (man... God... how unfair you are... lol)

Perhaps, psychotic people's common disconnect?

The thing called feeling that no one could understand (including themselves)... ? 8-O lol

Then I heard
"Madame psychosis"
I raised my head
Three well-dressed ladies walking by
Well-educated, too, I thought

"Madame psychosis"
Sounds really old

Delusions or perceptions formed I know
No need even to
hear my own thoughts

Back to the book
I read

More of the similar tails I read
With my red Cadillac
Nach Hause I went..

En route
Boys I saw
hanging out at the corner

Red cart I push...
Multiple purposes such red cadilac
Walker in incognito
plus strength training devise
The cart I praised

"About that
Such she is gong to blog"
One of the boys said

Getting back to my room
From my day's eventful and eventless journey

Auditory hallucinations or not
Self-referencing ideologies or not
Grandiose delusions or not

Zu hause
I blog

Zum Ende
That chapter of Oliver Sacks

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